Aatm manthan..(आत्म मंथन )

Standing still.. in the dark.. all alone, Thinking deeply.. on my own... I knew.. I could handle "every thing", Be "happy" and even "laugh" and "sing".. Ready to face "anything" which life would bring, I was quite confident... that I could face its "sting". But now.. I don't know... what is the matter???, I am so weak and my hopes have shattered. Despite of my sincere effort, It was me who always got hurt. But still, I have always tiredlessly tried, I am quite sure, Really.. I never desired. "Expectations" are made.. I know, only from those who are "capable" enough. But not from people who are now truly weak.. who have lost their "shine" and forgotten their "technique"... Do you expect those "flowers" to bloom in your garden?? You are quite mistaken, I beg your pardon. "They" are now.. not what.. you "knew" them to be, "They" have changed a lot

aaj pata nahi kaise.. bachpan ke vo pal yaad aa gaye.. sookhi hui in aakhon mai phir nami si la gaye.. Vo swachhand jeevan, vo nirmal sa pyar!! Vo nischhal hasi, kya jeet..aur kya haar..!! Vo mamta ki chaav mai jam kar khilkhilana, Aur kabhi khel khel mai rona rulana.. Vo gudde aur gudiyan ki shadi rachana..!! kabhi doctor, kabhi nurse.. to kabhi enggineer ban jana.. Vo didi ko din bhar ki baatein batana.. Aur bhai se ladkar.. phir usko manana.. Vo bina soche samjhe sawalo se jhoojna.. Aur atpate jawabo ko bhi maan jana.. Vo apni anokhi si duniya mai kho jana!! Aur baaki saari jhanjhaton se bekhabar sa rehna.. Aha!! kya thi zindagi.. kya vo daurr tha.. man mai umang aur jeevan mai josh aur junoon tha.. Bas yun hi aaj.. vo swarnim din yaad aa gaye..!! sookhi hui in aakhon mai phir nami si la gaye..

God created me..gave me the power to create, nurture and transform Made me the one who could bring about any reform.. I have the passion, I have the power, you shudnt underestimate me, I m not just a crepe flower... Though I may not be so precious.. as I m not a pearl.. But I have my own importance.. I am a "Girl".. To love and care, and be influential in my lifetime, To be Hopeful, and enduring be it any time.. To be liable and judicious I was taught from chilhood, For all complicated issues in life I was tutored to 'brood'... Though I may not be so precious.. as I m not a pearl.. But I have my own importance.. I am a "Girl".. I am proud, but respect others along with, and aware of who "she" is, I never seek definition from the person I am with, nor do I expect "them" to read my mind, or stand beside me.. since I think I am quite capable of articulating my needs.. Though I may not be so precious.. as I m not a pearl.. But I have my own i

when i am all alone, when i am on my own.. when i am lonely, or just sitting silently.. then out of nowhere, how can you appear... in my thoughts, and in my fear???.. I wonder.. Is this "nothing"??..is it just one of my "petty" thoughts.. bcoz I often find myself blankly staring the dots.. I have many dreams and also I sumtimes live in them.. I never break those "rules"..though i may often condemn.. But..then out of nowhere, how can you appear... in my thoughts, and in my fear???.. I wonder.. Is this "magic"??.. I ponder over again and again.. bcoz as i see you.. I can get over all my pain.. I think of you.. and even speak to you, you may not even be present there though!!.. But..then out of nowhere, how can you appear... in my thoughts, and in my fear???.. I wonder.. Is this "attraction"??..I thought about that too.. bcoz whatever i think is somehow related to you.. I sing, I dance, I laugh and smile, yeah.. i can even forget you for a